Broken Glasses, Body Memories
Healing is a journey taken deep within. Your body holds the memories of all the pains and injustices felt throughout your life. Pain can be covered up by a pill or bandage, but to get rid of pain completely, you must do the hard work of processing and forgiving traumas.
Sometimes the healer needs healing. This is the case in my own life. Although I do Reiki over others, I need its power for myself as well. Today on the 4th of July, I woke up with a swollen, droopy, teary eye. It is painful, but more annoying than harmful. Still, my eye is trying to tell me something. I placed a cold compress to ease the pain, and I sat down to meditate. I thought back to last year on the 4th of July.
The fireworks burst over my friend’s house, high above the Michigan trees, adding to the sizzle of the hottest summer on record. I sat on the steps of the camper trailer in his yard, my temporary home with my husband and young son. At least I felt grateful to have a bed and a shelter from the elements.
But, to make matters worse, I wore a pair of broken glasses. Earlier that week, I had set my glasses on top of my car while I put on my sunglasses, and then forgotten about them. A half hour later, I arrived at my destination. I looked in my car to take off my sunglasses, and change back into my regular glasses, but, to my horror, I could not find the glasses. I panicked. To say that I am blind as a bat is insulting to the bat. I am sorely dependent upon my glasses.
I turned my car around and drove back to my friend’s house, slowly, scouring the road for any sign of optical life. I found the glasses laying in their case in the middle of the road, cars going by on both sides. I parked my car and waited for the traffic to clear. I nabbed my specs, still nestled in their cracked case, and took them back to my car. Hands shaking, I opened the case.
The glasses lay with frame twisted and mangled. I moaned to my husband, “What am I going to do?”
He replied, “Look closer.”
In the middle of the carnage, a miracle. God only knows how many times cars had run over the glasses, yet the lenses stayed completely intact. Not a scratch. God had worked a small miracle for me. It is amazing that with all of the world problems occupying his time, God still sent an angel to watch over my glasses.
I pieced the frame back together, and I actually formed a cool design with the tape. Still, I mourned because I had no money for an eye exam or new glasses. I know that sounds pitiful and ungrateful, but it felt like the last straw in a series of misfortunes. I was also hobbling around on crutches at this point with a severely sprained, maybe broken, ankle and no insurance to see a doctor. Still, again, God had supplied those crutches.
I felt all alone in the world. My family and most of my friends had disowned me simply because they believed in a hateful church doctrine with which I disagreed. They had thrown the gambit, and I had chosen to pursue the path of Love and the universe. Did anyone care about my struggles?
Months went by and things slowly got better for me and my little family. We moved to Minnesota and found work, and I bought new glasses. Through Reiki, time, and the innate healing powers of my own body, my ankle healed. Small miracles.
Yet, my body holds these painful memories. With meditation, Reiki, and prayer, I am learning to let go and make room for true healing.
If you are hurting today, listen to the message of your body. Meditate on the root of your pain, large or small. Let your muscles relax, and release those memories to the Universe. Forgive all the wrongs you have experienced. Forgiveness does not make the actions right or just, it only releases the injustice to the hands of karma and the great Judge.
Let go and let the healing flow!